Single Serving Positivity

In October of 2009, I find myself on another plane. Actually the 3rd flight back to the Mid-West since August, except something was distinctly different about this flight than all the rest. Typically, before a scheduled flight out, I have nightmares of unspeakably horrible things happening while in the air (similar to that scene in Fight Club), then I wake up the morning of with my heart racing at the speed of a lab rat’s, neurotically over-pack (for fear of coming off as I did in middle school when I threw caution to the wind and did all my shopping at thrift stores… I have pictures to prove it), and when we are about to take off, pop an Ativan, order white wine and pray… and I mean cross-myself-The-Lord’s-prayer-forgive-me-of-my-trespasses-repent-for-my-sins-PRAY. Yes, stewardesses have been known to ask if I would "benefit from an oxygen mask" or two. I’m surprised they don’t have my name on their personal bulletin boards with a disclaimer: “PASSENGER KATIE HENRICKS IS INSANE. Just keep the bottled $6 wine coming and you’ll have no problem”. But this time, I felt at ease the whole way through.

I spent about an hour trying to put my finger on it, and once I did, I was quite surprised by what I found. It’s not that I’m on a huge indestructible plane, have an Air Force veteran as a pilot (which I would love), or even that I love whom I am going to see, which I do. I wholeheartedly felt at ease. Once aboard, I took in the people around me, and this is what I experienced: old people, people who had lived their lives (probably great lives fully of dramatic war stories, creating families, enduring deaths and lives abound, wealth, and now… relaxation in their old age), a man in front of me, in pain, who had just lost his partner due to suicide, a gay couple in the back who I had spoken to who are part of Shriner's and believe in community, philanthropy, ethics and taking care of one another.

I couldn't help but wonder… is your flight experience, or any experience for that matter, due to the people who are around you? I had never had a flight full of so many wonderful passengers with such open hearts and generous stories. Or, are they directly related to how open and relaxed YOU are? When I think about it, concerts and festivals are this way. Movies are this way. Trips are definitely this way. It is all about whom you are around.

Any experience can be good or really really bad depending on your attitude and numerous uncontrollable factors, but when you are around people who are at peace and are calm… it has a similar effect on you, or at least it did on me on this day.

My mom is known for many, some nerdy, sayings, but ALL ARE TRUE. She says “surround yourself with positive people”. Well, tell that to someone who’s boarding a plane full of strangers. One really has little control over that. Her point is- when you are around positive people, you become positive, and all those other little, joyous things in life. Also the opposite is true. And she never lets me forget this.

So, as I find myself sitting next to an old woman drenched in an emerald green, rose patterned sweat suit, I see she is reading a book called “The Obsessive Traveler”. I like to experience anyone I can, so I turn to her and say “how’s your book?” She looks up at me as if she barely understood what I just said and answered “oh, good”… and that was it… the end of our flight relationship. We all have them.

Tyler Durden says that all flights have "single-serving sugar, single-serving cream, single pat of butter. The people I meet on each flight? They're single-serving friends." We sit next to a before stranger for 1 hour to 10 hours and make buddies, exchange business cards, talk life, relationships, books, professions. You can promise to call, meet up for lunch, visit their website, etc, but does it really ever happen? Every once in a while, yes. But I’ve had these encounters numerous times, probably because I’m literally “chatty Kathy”, or rather “chatty Katie”, but nonetheless, it never fails. I intended to stay in contact with the girl who’s husband was in IT, like mine, the woman who understood my frustrations when I boarded a plane frustrated and struck up a conversation with me and ended up being a celebrity chef for Prince and Spielberg, but I never did. I’ve lost their cards. Because flight relationships are just that… meant to stay on the plane they began on, most likely destined to go no further. Tear!

And like all relationships, whenever you finally find your seat next to that special someone that you will share hours with, the only thing we can really hope for is a positive person.

Today I vow to be a wholly positive person! Follow my mom's advice and join me! If just for today.